Every single day, I need to remind myself of this: by late afternoon, our household is a whirlwind of dysregulation and exhaustion. We're all as frazzled as each other, struggling to hold it together.
Yet, in those moments, I often find myself getting upset with my kids for being just that – frazzled and exhausted. I yell at them for not controlling themselves well enough, for not sorting out problems in a helpful or positive way, for not being reasonable. I tell them they need to stop yelling.
But the irony isn't lost on me. In those very moments, I’m not able to be reasonable, flexible, or helpful either. I’m dysregulated, overwhelmed, and my capacity to handle things is near zero – just like my kids. Yet, there I go, expecting these tiny humans to do a better job than I’m doing.
It's a humbling realization.
I apologized to them for yelling. They told me it was alright, that they could see I was dysregulated and exhausted. Their forgiveness was heartwarming, but it doesn’t make my behavior okay. At least they understood it was a me problem.
This journey of parenting is a constant learning process, filled with ups and downs. I’ll keep trying, striving to be more patient and understanding, not just with my kids, but with myself too.
After all, we’re all in this together, navigating the chaos one day at a time.